Friday, September 23, 2005

Why I'm Not a Practicing Catholic

The following is a simple outline I drew up in response to a friend's inquiry to why I no longer practice the Catholic faith. I may still call myself Catholic but that does not mean that I am Catholic. Someone asked me recently what I was and my answer of "Just me" didn't seem to satisfy. There is real benefit in defining one's self even if the parameters of a basic inner epistemology are as yet unknown. What once was may no longer dominate; what could be mightn't be discovered; all while the present stagnates, deteriorates, and ceases to participate in the worthwhile. The important thing in self-discovery, in defining an essence, is in pursuing some convincing and reassuring dimension that envelopes the whole. Let's see how far I take this. I seek that which needs sought so...

  1. Basic Universal Premises
    Jesus as a historical figure or the Son of God
    The idea of the Holy Trinity something difficult I'm sure for even the most learned.
    The Church as Central to salvation. Going back in time it is immensely important to trace an organization to its roots. All Christian churches certainly point to Christ as their Head but how is that Roman Catholism claims sole ownership?
  2. People Particulars
    The Church Hierarchy. This is always such a hot topic when pointing out Catholism's supposed weak points. I like the idea of deference but have a problem with the hierarchy being given great lip service while being completely forsaken. This seemingly comes about because of dramatic power struggles within the church and by its laity.
    Pedophilia. NEED I SAY MORE?! Scandals have rocked through the Church for ages. Differences in theology stand out as well as political upheaval. But what the??? This recent cover-up takes the cake for me.
    Resource Distribution. I have no problem with the Church having wealth materially, historically, or monetarily. I do have a problem the apparent lack of consideration in dealing with the needy while preserving nonfunctioning, diminishing churches or needlessly expanding mediocre structures in the name of competitiveness. The Church has a responsibility to uphold charitable necessities but places more emphasis on Keeping Up With the Protestants.
  3. Personal Trivialities
    Support. I am no rock. The cock hasn't crowed 3 times but is on continuous drowning cycle. All must hear my denial as the snake winds its way easily through expanding shadows of my life.
    Marital. This is very personal, and I am not seeking to blame my eternal partner in wedlock. I just thought that we'd have 6 plus children by now, attending Mass regularly, and placing God as the center of our life. NOT SO!
    Local. I haven't heard a priest give a deep meaningful homily since California. The California part may not be significant, because I'm sure there are countless good priests who stir up the best hell and damnation. I just miss hearing the word of God followed up by something so meaningfully personal that it speaks to the very trials and tribulations of the moment. How great would that be? Going to Church, feeling the presence of Jesus, experiencing the sacrifice on Mount Calvary, knowing that that same sacrifice offered some 2 thousand years ago is taking place now all in the name of your own personal dilemma, suffering, and misfortune. To feel that the priest knows via some touching oration certainly pays tribute to the ever presence of God.
    Feelings. Not to condone the charismatic movement but I haven't experienced that overpowering sense of wonder in some time. I can remember a moment where I was laying in bed envisioning the very real pain felt by Jesus on the cross while questioning the possibility of Man made Flesh. As I lay there it was as if I saw something dreamy and awe inspiring. Nuff about that least I believe mysewackybe a bit whacky.
    Habit. I simply lost the habit however it came about. Anyone having had smoked knows the VALUE and formative quality of habituation. There are good habits and there are bad ones. I lost the good habit of attending Mass and am not disposed to reacquaint myself with it except in participating in my kids weekly Mass at their Catholic school.

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